Hey blog,
It's super late here. Not that late for you, actually. It's 4:15. I have two chapters of voice bits left to do for chinese, and I need to read the condensed version of The German Ideology. I'll probly sleep for two or three hours tonight. I slept for two last night, with only fifteen minutes nap in between. But my god, what a beautiful nap it was. Yes indeed. I just cleaned my sheets for the first time all freshman year, and they felt wonderful, all clean and inside eachother once again. Still thinkin about girls and guys. Still feelin bad about it. Getting closer to deciding I should tell the girl something about why Im acting this way. Probly will this weekend if not sooner.
Had a cool talk with Robby tonight. Started off about Nietzsche, got into our ultimate concepts of reality. He believes in contentment and helping others find contentment. I believed that could only be a lie. To be authentic is not to help others. The only way to NOT treat them as an end is not to help them! Hahaha! Oh KANT, I've deviled you! Ahahahaha!
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Hey blog! Oh man! shit is so complicated! I complicate shit! But in truth its not actually that complicated.
Also, Michael Jackson!!!! wWooO!OO! I'm playing him on the speakers in my room. Jolly good time.
I went out with Alex, Jennie and Noel last night. We went to the Real Original Jumbo Slice and got those huge pieces of pizza for five dollars. Then we went to one of those swanky new yogurt shops with the raspberries and fruity pebbles. We talked about having one room in the suite for sleeping where all the beds would be, and another for hanging out! Isn't that awesome? I think it probably breaks fire cods, so we'd have to be stealthy about it. har har, it'd be like having a slumber party every night lols!!!!! AHHH so much fun!
Anyway, the girl I mentioned in the last post is still on my mind. She proved to be even cooler than I suspected, though then shit got mixed up in my head with the whole mess I've been dealing with for the last year. More than a year now... this cloud needs to be removed. I'm only gonna be alive for probly seventy years if my lucky. One of those years has had this shit around it. Poo.
Also, Michael Jackson!!!! wWooO!OO! I'm playing him on the speakers in my room. Jolly good time.
I went out with Alex, Jennie and Noel last night. We went to the Real Original Jumbo Slice and got those huge pieces of pizza for five dollars. Then we went to one of those swanky new yogurt shops with the raspberries and fruity pebbles. We talked about having one room in the suite for sleeping where all the beds would be, and another for hanging out! Isn't that awesome? I think it probably breaks fire cods, so we'd have to be stealthy about it. har har, it'd be like having a slumber party every night lols!!!!! AHHH so much fun!
Anyway, the girl I mentioned in the last post is still on my mind. She proved to be even cooler than I suspected, though then shit got mixed up in my head with the whole mess I've been dealing with for the last year. More than a year now... this cloud needs to be removed. I'm only gonna be alive for probly seventy years if my lucky. One of those years has had this shit around it. Poo.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Hey blog,
I just got owned. I met a girl on Friday. I thought she was cute and pretty cool. I was hanging out with her with some friends. Then one of my friends comes in and woos her. They make out later. But he doesnt tell me. He then encourages me to pursue her. I am a chicken shit and act like a pussy. At some point, she says shes not attracted to me.
Yaaaay! Fun! One of the first possibilities I have felt for a real connection of the romantic sort, and it got totally shit on. I dont know if she wasnt attracted to me from the start or the circumstances made me seem less attractive. But the whole fucking thing got shit on. Things are so messed up, I might not even be able to be friends with her. Hurray!
My friend who made out with her is still hitting on her! Yaaaaay! Even though he has a fuckbuddy he purportedly loves! and has sex with every day! Yaaaay! And he's an idiot and could never, EVER appreaciate this girl for what she is. yaaaay! And I feel like a total douche cuz im such a chickenshit i stood around while it all happened! yaaaay! I am so goddamn passive...
i let everyone else decide what was happening... fuck.
I just got owned. I met a girl on Friday. I thought she was cute and pretty cool. I was hanging out with her with some friends. Then one of my friends comes in and woos her. They make out later. But he doesnt tell me. He then encourages me to pursue her. I am a chicken shit and act like a pussy. At some point, she says shes not attracted to me.
Yaaaay! Fun! One of the first possibilities I have felt for a real connection of the romantic sort, and it got totally shit on. I dont know if she wasnt attracted to me from the start or the circumstances made me seem less attractive. But the whole fucking thing got shit on. Things are so messed up, I might not even be able to be friends with her. Hurray!
My friend who made out with her is still hitting on her! Yaaaaay! Even though he has a fuckbuddy he purportedly loves! and has sex with every day! Yaaaay! And he's an idiot and could never, EVER appreaciate this girl for what she is. yaaaay! And I feel like a total douche cuz im such a chickenshit i stood around while it all happened! yaaaay! I am so goddamn passive...
i let everyone else decide what was happening... fuck.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Mental note:
I was going to write this for a class, since only the form of the essay is required, not the content. However, I'm afraid she would have penalized me for not taking the assignment seriously. So, I'm putting the outline here so that I remember it, and hopefully some day soon I'll be able to write this and put it on Facebook.
My essay on Latino teenagers
Thesis: Latino teenagers frighten me.
Outline: Thesis paragraph, mention photograph and my subtle fear, which I hid from everyone.
Read the devil’s highway. I can’t relate to the trouble people have immigrating across the border. It is so hard, how could a normal person endure such a thing? Whenever I see a Latino person, I ask myself, “How did they do it?”
A memory: the guy at th yugioh tournament that only played the kids. And my sister’s friends who stole my paintball guns (were now latino).
Detail: how I prefer esteban’s burrito bus to a Mexican restaurant and his greasy claws can’t reach out and get me from inside his derelict vehicle. Having open space between me and a latino, as in a restaurant, makes me nervous.
My essay on Latino teenagers
Thesis: Latino teenagers frighten me.
Outline: Thesis paragraph, mention photograph and my subtle fear, which I hid from everyone.
Read the devil’s highway. I can’t relate to the trouble people have immigrating across the border. It is so hard, how could a normal person endure such a thing? Whenever I see a Latino person, I ask myself, “How did they do it?”
A memory: the guy at th yugioh tournament that only played the kids. And my sister’s friends who stole my paintball guns (were now latino).
Detail: how I prefer esteban’s burrito bus to a Mexican restaurant and his greasy claws can’t reach out and get me from inside his derelict vehicle. Having open space between me and a latino, as in a restaurant, makes me nervous.
Tired me
Advanced Writing
Bo Banducci
I am, as they call it in the professional world, “philosophically corrupt.” Do I sound pretentious? I am, and without good reason. I, as all humans who do not constantly submit their tender opinions to public debate, see the lovely traits of my personality in exaggeration compared to the rest of the world’s. Consider this idiotic paragraph, which I composed in a former essay:
Like all pretentious people, I appear to myself to be on a unique and nobler path than my peers. I am obsessed with questions that most people don’t ask, one which will be the focus of this essay: “What should I really be gaining, day to day, from my life in college, and is the trade-off in doing(in a philanthropic sense) for learning, that we all agree to when we enter into higher education, ever not worth it?” I want to know, 24-hours a day, if being at college is the smartest thing for me to do.
And this one, which follows as it seems to do: This question first presented itself to me in a personal way when I began writing reflective memoirs for my Advanced Writing class. Reflection always yields insight, and my favorite style of interpretation – seeing everything as life-affirming and inspirational – always germinated the seeds of impatience and thrill-seeking in my heart’s soil. The amazing charter high school experience I had that was a direct result of running away from anticipated bullying at the public high school reminded me of the fantastic and unseen opportunities people often stumble into. It invigorated my romantic sense of agency. It excited me for life and for my next important, life-changing decision
The world beyond college to me is as a bloody war is to the inexperienced, vainglorious cadet. That is, I am hankering for something I don’t understand.
This is a great story that may or may not be relevant depending on your ability to interpret:
“Bo,” he said, looking directly at me. I couldn’t take my eyes off his peanut butter and jelly sandwich. “You’ll never pick up The Republic again once you graduate from here.” We both laughed. I sat in my professor’s office hours. The office was pretty cheap for such an expensive school. Small, gray walls and no windows. We’d gotten away somehow from discussing the philosophy of Locke and Hobbes, which was fine by me. My brain kept freezing as I tried to understand the concepts, making me feel like a dunce under his wizened gaze.
“College is for getting smarter and more articulate. I feel bad for all those MBA guys. On average, it takes 3 to 6 months for a person with an unrelated major to be on equal ground with a person with a major in the field. Four years of study is negated in three to six months.” I opened my eyes wider and said,
“Wow,” also nodding with appropriate surprise, still stuck in receptive student mode. What my passivity didn’t betray was how significant that piece of information was to this train of thought. Though he had broached the subject after mishearing something I said about ethics, I was nonetheless grateful... (there was more)
Bo Banducci
I am, as they call it in the professional world, “philosophically corrupt.” Do I sound pretentious? I am, and without good reason. I, as all humans who do not constantly submit their tender opinions to public debate, see the lovely traits of my personality in exaggeration compared to the rest of the world’s. Consider this idiotic paragraph, which I composed in a former essay:
Like all pretentious people, I appear to myself to be on a unique and nobler path than my peers. I am obsessed with questions that most people don’t ask, one which will be the focus of this essay: “What should I really be gaining, day to day, from my life in college, and is the trade-off in doing(in a philanthropic sense) for learning, that we all agree to when we enter into higher education, ever not worth it?” I want to know, 24-hours a day, if being at college is the smartest thing for me to do.
And this one, which follows as it seems to do: This question first presented itself to me in a personal way when I began writing reflective memoirs for my Advanced Writing class. Reflection always yields insight, and my favorite style of interpretation – seeing everything as life-affirming and inspirational – always germinated the seeds of impatience and thrill-seeking in my heart’s soil. The amazing charter high school experience I had that was a direct result of running away from anticipated bullying at the public high school reminded me of the fantastic and unseen opportunities people often stumble into. It invigorated my romantic sense of agency. It excited me for life and for my next important, life-changing decision
The world beyond college to me is as a bloody war is to the inexperienced, vainglorious cadet. That is, I am hankering for something I don’t understand.
This is a great story that may or may not be relevant depending on your ability to interpret:
“Bo,” he said, looking directly at me. I couldn’t take my eyes off his peanut butter and jelly sandwich. “You’ll never pick up The Republic again once you graduate from here.” We both laughed. I sat in my professor’s office hours. The office was pretty cheap for such an expensive school. Small, gray walls and no windows. We’d gotten away somehow from discussing the philosophy of Locke and Hobbes, which was fine by me. My brain kept freezing as I tried to understand the concepts, making me feel like a dunce under his wizened gaze.
“College is for getting smarter and more articulate. I feel bad for all those MBA guys. On average, it takes 3 to 6 months for a person with an unrelated major to be on equal ground with a person with a major in the field. Four years of study is negated in three to six months.” I opened my eyes wider and said,
“Wow,” also nodding with appropriate surprise, still stuck in receptive student mode. What my passivity didn’t betray was how significant that piece of information was to this train of thought. Though he had broached the subject after mishearing something I said about ethics, I was nonetheless grateful... (there was more)
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